Random

This feeling is like no other. The rush it gives me as well as the depression. I'm that close to being on my own, starting my own life, but that close to being able to turn to no one for guidance.

In my own world i am a journey man learning the skills of control, self control and control of daily events. Looking back on my life i see that i haven't grown up that much. I'm the same as i was before just in a bigger body still learning how to do the same old things. I keep asking does life really change at all. If u move to a new location does anything really change, you still have the people u like and the people that u don't as well , as people with power and people u have power over. Everything may look different but is that all it is; is it only a different look but the same thing.

Sitting here in my room is a curse to me. It's not easy being a guy with deep thoughts when every one thinks guys are pointless at that sort of thing. I ponder about what could have been in the past and what maybe in the future. I end up fearing the future alot because i know that it cant be possible to be easier then the past. The feeling of not having the control to face life head on in all sorts of ways. All i know is the best way to beat life is to make alliances, these people are my friends and i don't know who i would be if i didn't have them.